The systems manager

We cannot at all change the system, the systems manager had said of our procedures.You had come here then in the wee hours, in swaddle cloths of smelly piss and drool .Much earlier, there was this rubber hose that stretched to the sky, to its flying birds. Now you are man dealing with a shadow in the night in a purely visceral system of blood and fluid.

There was in fact no love, only a system of tight-screw effect flowing from cause,when she would become big with stomach in a midnight moment of coalescing .You kicked tiny feet against its rubber walls.It was a system that you could not change.

Later you thought you knew the system. A matter of procedures where it happened.Then you were here, your lungs full of wind ,your eyes filled with thin colored dreams.At times you wanted to change the system to make all that happen as in baby-dreams. Dreams were insubstantial snow-flakes of last winter season, that would vanish in thin air,when your clenched baby-fists loosened grip .And now you are no longer around to monitor if the systems are in place and working well.

(remembering my former colleague and systems manager Mr.Ravi Kaul who had passed five years ago)